APEX

SURVEILLANCE & INFORMATION SPECIALISTS

(APEX SIS)

When Knowing Is Important

 

CLUES

Suspicions of infidelity in a relationship can be extremely stressful and emotive. Whilst you need to know for peace of mind, having it confirmed can place additional stress on that relationship. This is one of the reasons why we at “APEX SIS" strongly advise against conducting your own Surveillance. 

You do not want to have your partner aware that you are suspicious and following them.  If they are innocent and you are discovered there may be a hostile reaction and subsequent resentment to your actions. Your relationship could be adversely affected.

Before you consider taking any form of personal or legal action make sure you get the facts and make sure they are 100% accurate.

Statistics show approximately 1 in 2 marriages are failing. It is therefore reasonable to assume that a large proportion of these breakups are due to infidelity.

So, how do you know if your partner is being unfaithful?  Well, the fact is, you may not know or may not find out until months, sometimes years later.  You may have thought to yourself “ that’s odd, why did that happen”. When this thought crosses your mind on more than one occasion, maybe your intuition is telling you something.

If you are not already in a committed relationship, marriage or defacto, you might simply want reassuring that all is well before taking that next step.

The following clues may help you to recognise some of the signals in establishing if your partner is being less than honest or unfaithful to you.

Note:
The list do not purport to be conclusive, nor is it exhaustive or scientifically researched and proven.  This list is compiled from client feedback and general life/work experiences and serves only as a guideline to be read in conjunction with whatever is happening regarding your personal circumstances at that time.    

CLUES TO LOOK FOR IN YOU PARTNER MIGHT INCLUDE

A person may well exhibit some of these clues individually and it may be quite innocuous and explainable i.e. A genuine desire to improve the relationship or their own appearance and self esteem. There may well be pressures at work or personal circumstances that are contributing to their change in behaviour and attitude towards you.

However, if several of these activities or behavior become more frequent then certainly your suspicions might be aroused.

If, you have ticked several boxes and combining your overall knowledge and assessment of your situation and circumstances, you may well be quite justified in having the alarm bells ring.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU ARE STILL NOT CERTAIN OR CONVINCED?

1. Keep your own behaviour towards your partner as normal as possible
   (The theory is: enough rope and they will eventually hang themselves)
2. Keep your own discreet diary/recordings of their behaviour
3. Endeavor to locate some written or physical evidence, receipts, text messages, emails, online banking transactions, phone statements etc. This evidence will include:

• Receipts of credit cards/eftpos/cash showing: meals, bars, gift purchases from stores, petrol, business cards

• Names/phone numbers/addresses written on napkins, match boxes/cigarette packets, business cards

• Looking in briefcases, wallets, purses/handbags, desks, vehicles, diaries and appointment books, clothing pockets for the above items.

• Checking the partners clothing for aftershave/perfume, lipsticks

• Checking the vehicle for extra or a change of clothing or anything unusual

• Checking the vehicle odometer to confirm distances traveled.

• Checking telephone and cell phone accounts for numbers frequently called or text or ones you are unfamiliar with

• Checking the redial button on your land line telephones and/or  telephone/fax

• Files held on his/her personal computer e.g. Emails, Pictures, other folders

Speak discreetly to friends, family and your partners work colleagues to confirm his/her alibis.

SUMMARY

Do not attempt to conduct your own surveillance

1. It can be extremely risky and dangerous

2. It may be very hurtful and confrontational

3. It may compromise and damage a perfectly stable relationship particularly if the partner is innocent and you get caught spying on them

4. Think carefully about what legal or personal action you take if any
5. Do not confront your partner unless you have good solid evidence  
6. Surveillance is very much a Specialist area
7. Surveillance can be used not only to reveal the guilty, but also to clear the innocent

REMEMBER

You may have heard previous parties in a broken relationship say "Everyone knew except me", "How could I have been so stupid, so blind", "Why didn't someone tell me", "If only I had known".

More often than not, close friends and/or work colleagues do have an idea of what is happening in your relationship but are too afraid to say anything for fear of being branded interfering, trouble maker or disloyal.

Once you have had your suspicions confirmed and located some form of evidence, then you might consider the next option of "Covert Surveillance". This is where APEX SIS can help you.